I'm too caffeinated to think of an appropriate title.

"Howdy, Cousin," one apple said to the other. The speaker had a green tinge to his dull skin and he wore a filthy bandanna over his mouth, muffling his rough voice. He was flanked by two of the ugliest pieces of produce imaginable. To his right, a corpulent, oozing, bruised tomato called Harold, a freshly lit cigar jammed into the corner of his mouth. To the apple’s left was a lanky carrot that looked like he’d been boiled more than once, and who answered to the name Slim. Cowboy apple stared at the trio, hands placed lightly on his gun belt. “Howdy…cousin,” he replied quietly.

Caption written by some nut job.